I’ve never been banned from a bar, restaurant, or business. It’s not because I was always on my best behavior. It’s because when I do bad things I’m simply quiet about it. Shoplifting cakes from a bodega happened during the lunch rush. Getting into arguments with my exes at bars always happened outside. Some people, however, are not as stealthy in their mischief. Then there are the people who were unwitting victims of unreasonable business owners. This r/AskReddit thread features stories from both sorts of characters, detailing the deeds that got them banned from public establishments. Some of them are embarrassing. Other stories are just plain dumb. But most of the tales are entertaining.